I was introduced to the term “living your truth” last year at an event with Dutchess of Black Ink Crew at a youth center for gay and lesbian teens in Charlotte, NC. This event was one of the most humbling and eye opening events I had ever attended. Who would have thought a woman in her 30s who thought she had her life all planned out would learn so much from these kids. But I did, I learned all about living in my truth.
For years I struggled with knowing exactly who I was. I spent the majority of my life wanting to be accepted and liked. I did anything to keep my friends and others happy with me and nothing hurt me worst then knowing someone was upset with me. I have always worked a 9-5, but they were basically just to pay the bills. Nothing of true passion or expressing the true me. At this point in my life I was so far off from living my truth and I had no clue who I really was . I lived the life that I thought others wanted to see me live or the life that made others happy. I truly neglected myself, my happiness, and my state of mind.
For years I dealt with depression. I never understood why because at sight I had everything going for me. This includes my relationship with God and my commitment to religion. I loved God and I loved my church family, but any given weekend you could find me in a club and the next day (Sunday) find me in church. My mind was far from stable because I was living both lives, that of a committed Christian as well as that of the on the scene girl who like to party and have a good time. I wanted so badly to please my church family and my mom that I was literally living two lives smh. This caused me to lose myself and almost lose my mind because I had no idea who I really was or what I wanted in life. Not to mention during this period I got sick and didn’t have a clue what my future held (that opened my eyes too, but I’m going to save that for my book).
I started blogging in December 2015 and birthed Keeping up with Kei. I was just blogging about subjects that would pop up in mind lol. Just random topics any given day. It gave me peace and me being a quiet girl it gave me a voice. I reached out to a popular blogger Cherisse Jamison for some pointers and she was awesome. Her blog is very successful and often filled with celebrity interviews and events. Cherisse gave me my first celebrity assignment, attending Dutchess’ event with gay and lesbian teens. This gave me the opportunity to talk to Dutchess and test out my interview skills. It was that moment of hearing stories from those kids about living in their truth despite what anyone thought that gave me the motivation I needed.
Living in your truth means allowing that person inside of you to come out, and live freely, happily and in truth. We spend so much time living life how it is supposed to be that we forget to live in happiness and truth. In all honesty we spend a majority of our lives living to be someone else.
Here is my guide to living in your truth:
- Accepting who you are- Identify who you truly are and what makes you happy. Take everything and everyone out of the equation and only focus on you. What do you think about constantly? What is it that you cannot live with out? Don’t worry about anyone else’s opinion of you.
- Define your truth- now that you have accepted who you are define it. Are you a boss? Are you a motivator? Are you a speaker? Are you a life coach? Or are you identifying with your sexuality or personality? Whatever it is, define it!
- Live it- Now that you have accepted who you are and defined it, its time to live it. Live it to the fullest. Be the best at being the real you that you can be. I promise it feels so good being your self.
To find your truth, you may have to separate yourself for awhile. Take time to mediate and pray about who you really are. I encourage fasting from social media during this journey. Nothing can cloud your vision of life like social media can lol. Everybody’s life looks perfect there. Once you start living in your truth, life will be so different.
Now that I am living in my truth, I am embarking a journey I never thought I would take. The once painfully shy girl is now co-hosting on radio shows, making media appearances, setting up speaking engagements, and inspiring everyone she can.
When I found my truth I realized that being quiet and shy was not me at all. It was the devils attempt to keep me from my destiny. I am still that girl that loves God and church and if you see me partying its for a purpose.
Never be ashamed of who you truly are. God made us all unique. Once you start living in your truth, your life will change. It may not be comfortable, but I can assure you its worth it. Examine your flaws, or what society perceives as flaws. Within them some of your truth lies.